Success Starts Here!

Shhh, this is one of the biggest secrets of all time. The magic formula for success, is HARD WORK. Sorry folks, I know you wanted something more dramatic. But that's it. I was watching a bodybuilding competition the other day and during the post-competition press conference, one of the reporters joked "how do I get as big as you?" Steroid controversy aside (for my more sarcastic friends), the competitor said "hard work, consistency, and determination." It made me think of how we, especially we Americans, have gotten so used to get rich quick schemes, six minute abs, the latest contraption on HSN, the latest pill or powder, the next big thing from your favorite technology company, that we expect everything to be within our reach within minutes. We are a society of "right now." Unfortunately and contrary to popular belief, success does not come from a pill or a contraption or a six-minute anything. Success comes from exactly what that bodybuilder said

I've gotta vent to you guys, venting is not as good for you as you might think. Today I wanted to talk about a topic which is near and dear to me, venting. Because of my job, I find myself at the center of a lot of work "drama." Let's say I'm like the guy between the boss and the employees. The guy the boss turns to when he needs an ear to let go of frustrations he can't share with the employees, and the guy the employees go to when they need a trusted shoulder to lean on. Needless to say, I hear a lot of venting. Some people seem to not know how to communicate in any other way as a matter of fact :). After many years of being supportive of people who vent, I came to the conclusion that venting isn't always the helpful mechanism we make it out to be. Now before you get upset and have to go vent to someone about my comments, just hear me out. When we think of venting, we think of getting this weight off our chest. The goal is to let this heavy issue go b

Father's Day, 1984; I was sitting in my cousin's house listening to the big deal they made about the day trying to understand exactly what my uncle brought to the table. He was a nice guy, seemingly had some role in his sons' lives (all his kids were boys), but for the life of me, I really couldn't understand the significance of a father. He had taught them lots of things but nothing I hadn't learned on my own. I grew up without a dad. Of course I had a father and I loved him dearly, but he wasn't part of the equation. That's no slam on him. He was who he was and made the decisions he made. But he quite literally was not an equation in my day-to-day life. Mom raised me. While sadly far too common today, back then our tiny family was the anomaly. My mother was the center of my world and taught me everything I needed to survive as best she could. So getting back to my cousins' house, I just didn't get it. I figured my mom had taught me all the lesso

As Facebook would have it, I crossed paths with an old friend who hasn't actively been in my life for awhile. He is a great guy and it was a true pleasure to spend some time catching up. I could hear him repeating old stories of times gone by, the crazy things we once did, and reminders of the man I once was. I entertained the stories and really enjoyed the trip down memory lane but I found that every time I tried to bring the conversation back to the here and now, I was met with the slightest bit of resistance. I could tell regardless of what I told him about my life today, he could only envision me through the prism of another time, and in another time I was a very different person. Hence the title to this post. As to be 100% sure I was using the word correctly (I have been known to use the wrong words quite convinced I sound intelligent), I looked the word Dichotomy up. "A division into two mutually exclusive, opposed, or contradictory parts." That's what the dic

So ok ok, some of you may know I am heavily into bodybuilding these days. And when I say "into" I mean,  I'm inspired by it and working towards looking like a bodybuilder, but I'm still shaped a little bit like if an M&M had a baby with Spongebob Squarepants. In other words, I'm a work in progress. But, I am in the gym 6 days a week and happily on my way, getting closer to my goals day by day. Anyway, I tell you this only to set the foundation for my comments; the "more you do, the more you get." Over the past year I've learned a lot of lessons in the gym, but the biggest lesson I've learned is that humans are HIGHLY adaptable. That is good and bad. The good part is no matter what life throws at us, we can usually meet the challenge or better yet, overcome it. Human beings are so adaptable, we have become the predominate species on this planet. I mean at some point, a naked human walked into a cold valley somewhere and thought "man I&#