The Social Network

Well ok so there was a little wordplay there in my title. No I'm not going to give you a review about Facebook or the movie. What I would like to talk about is how social media has made what I consider to be a healthy change in the hearts of its users.
Let's face it social media has changed our lives. For me it began with Myspace. It was fun. Getting to make my own backgrounds of course always honoring Boston or New England teams :), throwing random zip codes up and meeting people; it was such new ground. For the first time in our lives for those who remember the early to mid-90s, we were able to communicate with people outside of our world. We were able to make friends in places we had never seen, and we were also able to take on personas which we could never be. I think at some point I described myself as 6'4", athletic, hot, tall, dark, and handsome. Some of you who read this know me and know, um, as much as I would love to be, I am sadly none of those things.
Then came facebook. It was a social network which sorta forced you to be honest about who you were. At first, the idea between being the 6'4" hot sexy Jose and the real me seemed quite silly. I was not one of the original facebookers. I guess those people who were actually 6'4" and hot had no issues with this. At some point though, out of curiosity maybe, I dabbled in facebook. I put my real demographics in the system; my height, age, location where I grew up, and then all of a sudden, there it was, a friend request from an old buddy from high school. Then another. Then an old Army buddy of mine. Then the next one, and the one after. For the first time in my life, I wasn't just reaching past the borders of my real world, the physical existence of where I was, but I was also, and far more fulfillingly, reaching out past the normal bounds of "time".
For most of our humanity, we have been stuck with the physical and time limits to our relationships. Sure we all have buddies back in school. Sure we've got good friends who know us when we're young and struggling, and then there are those who are with us while we are raising children, then when they're getting older and going off to college, then when they're off to college and we are alone for the first time in years, and so on. Until facebook though, we normally weren't able to communicate with people across those specific eras in our lives like we can today. So the question we have had since facebook came into existence is "is that all such a good thing?" These days, people let us know everything about themselves online. Ok fine!!! You're "getting an espresso half a world away." I don't give a @#$%. Seriously. I think for awhile, like with any new technology social media like facebook went thru some growing pains. People went thru their "I have to tell everyone everything I am doing at all times" stage. Other people went thru their "I have to know everything everyone is doing" stage. Ultimately though, I think at this point, we are somewhere closer to where we began before all this technology, but with a little plus+.
You know just recently, a friend of mine from High School passed away. He wasn't really in my "clique". I wasn't really cool enough to be in any specific "clique". I wanted to be I'm sure, but I wasn't tall, fast, or strong enough to be an athlete. I wasn't smart enough to be one of the nerds. I wasn't "dark" enough to be one of the geeks. Heck, I'm Puerto Rican and I wasn't even in the Hispanic dance clique due to a genetic disease affecting very few Hispanics, two left feet. I was just Jose. Just a relatively generic nobody. I knew everyone but I wasn't necessarily on anyone's speed dial. The reason I mentioned that is because, facebook leveled the playing field. On this 2-dimensional world, the adult Jose could interact with my old high school buddies in a way we never could have back then. That led me to sharing and laughing and enjoying so many friends who I wish had been this close to me in high school but we just weren't. Not anybody's fault, they were somebodies, I was not. But the point is, my friend who recently passed away; I was able to interact with him; to appreciate him for not only who he was, but who he had become. I was able to gain so much from him and in losing him to a longstanding illness, I felt ever closer to the other high school friends with whom I have "friended" over time. I became so much more a part of my graduating class than what I graduated as; which was just a relatively generic nobody.
I have also had to chance to communicate with family whom I had lost touch with years ago. Some of whom I have never even met in real life. And yet, those who were so important to me during stages of my life are once again, inspiring individuals in my real world. I am meeting relatives I never knew existed and cherishing the ones I did. That is so friggin cool.
My friends, I hope you take advantage of this new era of social networking to communicate with those whom maybe in times past you wouldn't have. I hope this technology helps you heal old wounds, and close chapters in ur life or open chapters you simply could not have in years past. I hope if nothing else, it is giving you a shot at enhancing your true humanity; making better your full human experience. Ultimately though, this technology is not what defines you. So don't let it overwhelm your life. You have this one life to live, so make the most of it. Make the MOST of it....in every possible way.
As always, I believe in you, you just have to believe in yourself.